Simplifying your Valentine day: Free e-book

Valentine day is second most greeting cards sending holiday, just after Christmas. Americans alone spent approx 14.7 Billion dollars on 2009 alone for Valentine day gifts. Men spent lot more about $147 per person and Women were not too far behind with $87 per person on Valentine day gifts.

Valentine day is supposed to show your care and love, everyone you love including, your friends, kids, parents, spouse, girlfriend/boyfriend, all people you know and care for. Please be kind to single friends or recently single person in your life, as no holiday should exclude any group or any one.

Why does anyone have to wait for February 14th, to express thier love? Why it can not to be today, tomorrow, or everyday?

Before we had kids, Zenguy one valentine day surprised me by cleaning up computer room mess that was bothering me a lot. That gift meant a lot to me and I still remember it after many years while all sweaters and perfumes gifts are long forgotten. Now as a family, we celebrate it together, this year we are planning to visit a local museum that we all enjoy as a family, un-traditional maybe!, we may have whole museum to enjoy by our self that day who knows.

If you do celebrate this holiday, please take our consumerism out of it and do it from heart and handmade by simply following next few tips for more meaningful holiday.

1. Wish and show love to everyone you know, not only your spouse, or girlfriend/boyfriend.
2. Instead of flowers, give plants or seed packets to your loved one.
3. Cook something together instead of going out to eat.
4. Make handmade coupons to redeem later such as special uninterrupted time together doing something you both or all enjoy.
5. Tell or write 10 reasons why you love them.

Please download free ebook Simplify your Valentine day from New American Dream a group that promotes sustainability and avoiding consumerism. This free e-book has traditional and alternative ways of celebrating this holiday and if you do buy gifts, be a conscious consumer.

Make everyday Valentine day. Wish valentine day to everyone, specially someone who is alone, your single friends, elderly neighbors, your parents, kids. Wishing you all happy and meaningful valentine day. 

Zengirl

Gifts from heart during Holidays

Christmas is around the corner and many of us share or exchange gifts with friends and family around this time. Many times, these well meant gifts from people, after a few days or weeks, goes unused in some corner of our house and life. How should we give gifts that can be well liked and used by the receiver? Often time, it is possible to do with little thinking on our part. We will discuss a few type of traditional and not-so traditional gifts to give and receive.

1. Give gift of time

Giving gift of time is cost free, but very helpful. For example, give time for babysitting to someone who has small kids, so they can nap, go out or do something they like. You can take your elderly neighbor shopping, who may not be driving well. You can visit someone who is sick, deliver food, help someone with cleaning up their house, garage, mow their lawn etc., possibilities are endless. Make sure you know some tasks that may require longer time, volunteer and offer what you truly can, otherwise you and receiver both will resent it.
Sometimes, just listening others and being there in their time of need is more appreciated than any store bought gifts.

2. Gift of experience

Zenguy used to fly small plane, it has been a while since he has given up this expensive hobby. However, he has taken me and other friends, relatives on city flying tours and it has been wonderful for all of those who received it. You do not have to fly a plane, you can someone to a Museum they always want to go or subject they wanted to know more about. Cooking together also works, I cook meal with R, who makes mess of kitchen but it is a experience he will remember being part of. Watching stars, going camping, learning and doing something together will remain in our mind, long after, compared to silly plastic toys or gadgets.

3. Home made gifts

Simply made handbags, cookies in jar, soups in jar, hand made sweater or blanket, quilt has much more meaning to recipient. Here are some suggestions for home made gifts ideas from web.

Gifts and Crafts from a jar

50 home made gift ideas from the web

Free crafts and gifts made by you
 

4. Other suggestions

 a. Give cash instead of gift cards, as some of the gift cards charges hidden access fees and expires as months rolls by.
b. If you buy store bought gifts, take gift receipt to recipient, so they can exchange freely without being guilty.
c. Ask them what they truly need or want before buying something you "think" they want.
d. Give partial or all money towards a big items they want/need to buy.
e. If you have large family, draw up names so every one needs to buy one or two gifts only, instead of 22.
f. Consider giving to others less fortunate people than you, charitable donation does not need to waited for Christmas time, and can be done through out the year.

Gift Free Christmas

How to celebrate Christmas without money

No Christmas gift this year has unique ways to letting your friends and family know about no gifts and suggesting alternatives instead. Check it out.

Remember, giving gifts from heart is more important than any expensive item. If we can not pay it with cash, or have money to pay when credit card arrives, we should not purchase it. You can celebrate Christmas without money or gifts and still have great time with family and friends.

How do you celebrate holidays with friends and family? What do you like or dislike about the gift givings? I sure would love to hear from you and your suggestions.


Zengirl

Laidback Mornings: without an alarm

A few years ago, before we had kids, Zenguy and I both used to work in a corporate world. Our weekdays mornings were hectic and much hurried to say the least. Waking up to several alarm beeps (we needed it, as we kept hitting "snooze" button and going back to sleep) quick shower, toast/breakfast bars on the go, tea on go, while we listened to TV or radio traffic news and sitting on traffic jam till we reached office, finally breathing before getting to routine of day to day work issues.

Now, that I am at home, life is lot less hectic for all of us. We have not woken up to sound of alarm in years. We now wake up to sound of our children R (4.5 years) and P (8 months) in the mornings. It takes us a few minutes to be fully awake and than play with kids on bed for 10-15 minutes before getting up with them. Sometimes we wake up to sound of birds, that is also very soothing.

There is no radio or TV news sound in morning for us, we still eat toast or quick breakfast choices sometimes, but leisurely. Now, I am not saying, our every morning is perfect, some days kids are sick or cranky and some days we are so sleep deprived from previous night wakings that we become cranky :-) but despite all of these issues, mornings are much less hurried compared to when we both worked. When we have to go to preschool or work, Zenguy and I work as a team to get kids ready and fed. Zenguy is very sweet, some days he lets me catch some sleep in morning while watching both kids.

Our mornings are not sexy but they are lot satisfying and less hurried now. Best thing about it is, waking up to kids cooing (or crying) is lot better than alarm beep's harsh noise.

How is your morning routine? What works for you? I understand our situation is different, as I am staying home with kids and Zenguy has somewhat flexible work hours. I understand this routine may not work for everyone, but even if you are working, with no kids, you can try waking without an alarm or other harsh noises. For starter, try waking up one of the weekend day without alarm; just night before you lay your head on a pillow, wish or say time you would like to wake up next day and imagine yourself doing it. It has worked for me 98% time, without alarm, that is not bad, right?

When you wake up naturally, morning and day tend to go much smoother in my opinion. Try it, let me know how it worked for you.

Zengirl

11 reasons we hoard on things

Why it is hard to let go of stuff and why it is easier to hoard things in our life. To simplify our life and be more free, we need to keep only items we need, and use often.

When we start decluttering, it is overwhelming to go through it all. There are many reasons we hold on to stuff such as;

1. It holds past, precious memory of your childhood, your first time living alone, or first love, first trip, or all firsts you did in your life. It is hard to let go of those memories.

2. We have spend too much money on it.

3. We may need it someday syndrome keeps us getting rid of stuff.

4. If we have kids, it is little hard to simplify. (Not impossible, just hard)

5. We do not know where to begin.

6. We think our current system works, why fix it? It is part of your comfort zone.

7. It takes too much effort and time to clean it all.

8. It will be clutter again, why bother?

9. It might be valuable in 10 years, we can sell it then at better price. We are not hoarder, we are collector.

10. We'll just move in to a bigger place, or buy more storage system to place it all.

11. We as a species always hoarded things to survive since early days , so what we are doing is natural process. Blame early ancestor (early human) for our hoarding habits.

My biggest problem is kids ever changing stuff and "I may need it someday" syndrome and I have to work hard to overcome it. What are your reasons for holding on to your stuff? How do you overcome those reasons?

Zengirl

20 ways to be romantic for free (almost)

In the beginning of the relationship courtship, we (guys and gals alike) tend to go out of our ways to please some one we like, even spending lot of money on the dates to impress our loved ones. How do we still feel and be romantic when we are in long term relationship for awhile, and do not have much money left to impress our partner? There are a few ways to still be romantic on free or cheap, and shows you care from a heart.

1. Say "I love you" from a heart and mean it.
2. Smile, hug and kiss. Let him/her know you are happy to see them,.
3. Tell jokes when he/she is down (or not), cheer them up, be clown for them.
4. Be honest with them, do not hide things, also trust them.
5. Cook together some new recipe or old one, for each other.
6. Let him/her sleep in late, Massage back or feet for them.
7. Clean up house, car, garage and surprise them.
8. Do something special he/she likes but you may not; such as watch chick flick with her, go to a car show for him.
9. Write down top 10 reason why you love him/her.
10. Remember how you fell in love, share and recreate memories.
11. Hold hands and sit in peace, doing nothing.
12. Watch sunrise or sunset together.
13. Write special note or poem for him/her, even when you are not a good writer or a poet.
14. Send flowers or baloons just because (Some guys like that as well, as it is unexpected)
15. Say "sorry" when you are wrong/or have messed up.
16. When he/she is talking something from heart, listen without interrupting and without thinking of response to give back. Be open minded.
17. Create some ritual together and do it every year.
18. Stand up and support him/her when someone is not fair to them (even when he/she is not present)
19. Know your partner's moods and act accordingly.
20. Be supportive, Be flexible, Be understanding.

While these suggestions may not be flashy but they sure are from heart and will take an effort on your part and your partner sure will cherish it longer. While sometimes we like to and want to spend money for our beloved, we can still show, we care for them even when are low on cash but high on love.

How do you show you love someone? Do you spend money? Do you have ritual? What does your partner does that makes you feel loved? Usually best things in life are free and not things that you can buy.

Zengirl

10 Ways to declutter your house

Not too long ago, I wrote about 7 ways your clutter costing you , check it out, if you have not read it yet. In this post, we will take a look at a few ways to start decluttering, as it is often overwhelming to start, at least for me.

1. Start small, such as one drawer of dresser, or one small area near entrance or corner. Set a timer for ten minutes and clean as much as you can in those 10 minutes. (I can not remember where I have heard this 10 minutes tidy concept, if someone knows, let me know so I can give proper credit where it is due)

2. Involve your family: spouse, kids etc in it. Make it exciting as a game.

3. I usually get 5 large boxes/trash bags and label them, Keep box, Donate/sell Box, Throw away box, recycle box, and I keep one "maybe" box as well. I put that "maybe" box in one area for 2 weeks and If I do not miss it, out it goes in donate pile.

4. Start in one area/room and finish that area before moving on to other things. Sometimes, looking at old books/letters/photos can be distracting as I usually go back in time looking at old memories, keep those in "to-look-at later" box, when you finish with your 10 minutes tidy time.

5. Room will look messier and worse before it will start to look better, so do not worry. It will all come together at the end. Once you finish 10 minutes tidy time, and you think you want to continue, do so until you are ready to take a break.

6. If you have not used an item for 2 years, it should go in donate/sell pile. If you have an emotional attachment to it, see if it possible for you to keep a picture of it, or small piece of it, instead of whole thing. When in doubt, do not get rid of it, put in "may-be" box for awhile. It works for me usually.

7. Once you sort out items in area, find an appropriate storage place for all "keep box" items. Create appropriate storage area for incoming mail, outgoing mail, postage stamps, envelopes, etc in office space. Trash expired medicines, vitamins and makeup items. Also, throw away non repairable toys and electronic items.

8. Always recycle and reuse items first if you can. While you are purging your house, do not buy new gadgets or items for house, it will just defeat the cleaning process.

9. If it gets overwhelming, stop or work while you listen to upbeat music. Once you start to see small progress, it will encourage most of us to finish it all the way.

10. Show and teach spouse, kids and other family members where item should go, they will do it themselves next time. Maintaining is much easier once the process is in place.

Start it slow, everyday little time devoted to decluttering will make whole process easier. Once you have a cleaner house with less stuff or just enough stuff, everyone will be happier and finding things right away. Happy cleaning.

What are your decluttering methods? What works for your house?

Zengirl

7 ways your clutter is costing you

Having clutter around not only cost us our money but also our piece of mind and happiness with it. Your house might be filled with piles of books and magazines you mean to read it, the smaller size clothes in your closet when you get back to your college weight, every toys that kids got from family and friends, many bills are just a few of example of clutter that most of us go through in our lives. Kitchen, bathrooms and office are worst places in a house for clutter to pile up easily. Instead of you owning the stuff, your stuff ends up owning/controlling you. Here are few ways, clutter cost us more than we bargained for;

1. You misplace bills to pay or check to deposit in your huge piles of paper. By the time, you find anything, bill is past due and check is no longer cash-able (after 90 days). You have just lost money and added interest or fees on bills too.

2. You buy item, only to realize months later, that you had that same item in your storage pile somewhere in the house. It was hard to find and hence forgotten. Sometimes, you may buy same items a few times over the years, not remembering, costing you more money.

3. You panic when someone called for unannounced to visit, as it will be overwhelming to clean up clutter in such a short time. Either you are embarrassed when company comes or choose to do less social inviting on purpose, either way you are losing social life with friends and family because of your clutter.

4. You do not want to come home as cluttered and messy home does not make you feel better. So you tend to eat out more often and do more outside shopping to make yourself feel good, adding clutter to your already cluttered house.

5. You may think it is wise to put all extra storage in storage place, leaving your house cleaner. However, you may pay $50 a month for your junk and your house slowly begins to be cluttered again.

6. You may lose your valuable time finding things in the house. You may search every morning your car keys under the stuff pile, or you may find that food in your fridge has gone bad, wasting food and money both. Your self esteem may take hit.

7. You are not living your true potential life, due to all clutter. You are waiting for some miracle to make it all better, clutter robs you from happiness. A happiness you get when your sink is empty and kitchen is clean and your bills are paid on time. You will get so much joy once work is done and you can truly relax and enjoy your home.

Is clutter costing you in some ways? In future we will look at a few ways to get started on path to simplifying and de-cluttering.

Photo source: Comstock: Gettyimage

Zengirl